gonna make this quick, i am really tired.

had a good catch up with deborah, kayne, claire, kane, aj, mirani and the later part juan.

deborah's still retarded as ever. kayne's still as crappy. claire's still small, didnt grow.

haha okay yeah retarded i am.

so tired, and gosh my aunt is asking me to town with my gran to change some stupid thing.
i am fucking tired. still have to be at the airport by midnight to pick my sister up.

headache...

2 more days! excited and stressed.

gotta go catch my beauty sleep.

off to lala land.
till next time, don't be naughty.

your birthday's in 3 days..

i have never felt so stressed. all i can say is this is the best i can do. u have done so much for my birthday. gave a perfect one for me. but i can't do the same.
i am sorry. i hope this will work out well.
sigh.


its like 6.34 in the evening, the sun's hiding itself. no one's home, everything's quiet. its getting depressing.
there's something missing.

merry christmas everybody!

had a family party yesterday, helped from morning all the way. was really fun catching up with my crazy cousins. bitched about everything and anything under the rain.

went for dinner with rorey at morton's.
was okay, i wasnt really interested, as in i was too tired for dinner and being plastic to people i just met and don't really like.
oh well.

thanks for the wishes that came in everybody!
have a blessed christmas, and all the best in 2009.
cheers!

i dunno what's right to say. i dunno what's not to say. everything every move is just wrong.
i am given lies, and have no rights to ask?

pack of lies. i hate people not being honest.

specially the ones i put in so much for.

i admit, i have expectations back.

i feel like a 7/11.

i don't wanna think about it. i hope i can lose all my memories. i hope i never found anything out back then. its eating me alive. i am trying my best. if only u would step back, and take a look at the damage u have done.

Life wounds all of us. At best there is sorrow enough to go round. Yet because the deepest wounds are those of the soul and hidden to mortal sight, we keep hurting each other day by day, inflicting wounds that time mercifully scars over. But the scars remain, ready at a touch to throb angrily and ache again with the old gnawing wild pain. You remember that day in school when the teacher laughed? You were only a little fellow, shy and silent, sitting in the shadow of the big boys, wistfully looking toward the day when you would shine as they did. That day you were sure your chance had come. You were sure that you had just what the teacher wanted on the tip of your tongue, and you jumped up and shouted it out loudly and eagerly, triumphantly - and you were very, very wrong. There followed a flash of astonishment, an instant of dreadful silence, and then the room rang with mirth. You heard only the teacher's laughter, and it drowned your heart. Many years have gone over head since that day, but the sight of a little lad trudging along to school brings it back, and the old pain stirs and beats against the scar. You cover it over, hush it to quiet once more with a smile. "I must have been funny. She couldn't help it." But you wish she had.


And there was that time when your best friend failed you. When the loose-tongued gossips started the damaging story and he was pressed for a single word in your defense, he said, "Oh, he's all right. Of course, he's all right, but I don't want to get mixed up in this thing. Can't afford it. Have to think of my own name and my own family, you understand.

Good fellow, but I have to keep out of this." You felt forsaken. For weeks and weeks you carried the pain in your heart. The story was bad enough but would right itself. The idea that he should fail you, that he had not, rushed to your side at the first hint of trouble was bad enough, was unbearable. He came back again after it was all over, but the sight of him renewed the ache in your breast and the throb of pain in your throat. The scar was thin, and the hurt beneath it quivered. We all bear scars. Life is a struggle, and hurts must come. But why the unnecessary ones? Why hurt the souls of little children? Why say things to them that they must remember with pain all their lives? Why say the smart, tart thing that goes straight to the heart of someone we love because we would relieve ourselves of the day's tension and throw off a grain of the soul's bitterness? Who are we to inflict wounds and suffering and scars on those about us? Staggering, blind mortals, groping our way from somewhere "here" to somewhere "there" conscious of little but the effort to stay "here" a little longer! It behooves us to travel softly, regardful of one another's happiness, particularly where our path crosses that of those dependent upon us for comfort or enters into the heart of little children.

Quote from James 2 years back.
"be careful Darius, there's an old expression, 'only the good die young' and I don't want you to stress yourself out with other's problems and give yoursefl a bad time trying to fix the world.
you have to realise there are limitaions to what you can realistically do."

school thing was well, but have to settle with ns shits.

i went on a crazy on shopping today. haven't shopped like this in ages. haha like some lil aunty fighting through the store.
bought a couple of stuff for myself. and some christmas presents :D
wanna be santa claus this year.

no more shopping, need to save up. save up for chinese new year sales!
hehehe, thats not right darius. but fuck it. hehe.

thinking whether to spend christmas at rorey's place. small lil sweet gathering. or go to a fancy party. have to find or host one at least. hmmm.

to santa..

i am not asking for a white christmas this year. but please make my christmas wish come true..

moment i woke up, heard some shocking news. i am worried, shaken and damm frightened. i just don't know how to react now.

i have an interview in an hour or so for school. and i m not feeling good about it.
if all fails, i have to accept my fate.

i am crying out for a miracle. God do u see my worries and fears? Do u feel the burdens and responsibilities i am carrying? it's just not the time to send me away for 2 years.
i have not been good, but i am lost and desperate. i need directions, i need answers.

hello everyone~
finally got a real blog.
haha i am speechless for the moment.

well, there's alot on my mind, but i am not going all drama on my first post. gonna post something happy litterally.


HAPPY!

done.

Insert tagboard codes here.
Cbox / Myflashbox / Shoutmix

kane
kino
kayne
deborah
junting
aj

December 2008 January 2009 February 2009 March 2009

Designer: X X
Hosts: X X X
Font: X
Image: X Base: X